Smriti Mukta Phalam
87. Lineages (Families) to be Rejected in Marriage
1. Manu - The following ten families must be rejected in marriage, though they might be very good and richly endowed with cows, goats, money and foodgrains. They are - Devoid of achara spelt out in Srutis and Smritis; devoid of male progeny, due to fear of the cessation of lineage; devoid of Vedic study; too hairy on body, as it is the form of Nirruti - Sruti says, ‘Body which is uncouth and too hairy must be offered in homa to Nirruti Devata, as that is the body of Nirruti’; having piles; having tuberculosis; having diseases like dropsy; having epilepsy; having white leprosy and having other leprosy. Due to fear of contracting the disease, these are to be rejected.
2. Yagnavalkya - Girl should be taken from a large family of srotriyas, famous for 5 persons in father’s line and 5 in mother’s. One should not take girl from family having communicable diseases like leprosy, epilepsy etc., though the family may abound with sons, grandsons, cows, servants and villages.
3. Yama - One should reject family whose Pravara is unknown, family of Ritviks, handicapped family, family of persons having extra body parts, family having dropsy, or white leprosy, family too lusty, too hairy on body, having epilepsy, or jaundice, too tall, too short and too coloured.
4. Manu - One who looks for raising the greatness of his family should always establish relations with superior people; discard the lowly. One should establish marital relations with those purified by good deeds, knowers of Srutis and Smritis, those who observed brahmacharya as per rules, those born in great families, those with marital relations with great families, those who are generous, happy, doing good to the righteous, righteous themselves, those with equanimity of vision, free from anger and graceful. Those unfit for marital relations are thieves, tale - bearers, eunuchs, atheists, those who live on abhorrent means, those with uncouth appearance, those who have enmity with the valourous, those who offend the king, those who take away and enjoy brahmanas’ wealth and miserly people. One should also attentively reject families with no progeny, or begetting only females, and having adulterous relation with other men. Man follows the conduct of father or mother or both. One born in evil family cannot give up his nature.
5. Haaritha - Son may take after the quality of his mother’s brother; daughter, the quality of her father. Man adopts the conduct of his mother.
6. Vishnu - One should examine horse through its male progenitor, girl through her mother, land through the grass and family through achara.
88. Marriage with Girl not from same Varna
1. Manu permits marriage with girl not from the same varna with some restrictions - For men of all three varnas, girl from the same varna is the best in the first marriage. For those who marry again due to lust, the following are the best. For sudra, girl from the same varna alone is suitable. For vaisya, girl from the same varna and sudra girl are suitable. For kshatriya, girl from the same varna and vaisya and sudra girls are suitable. For brahmana, girl from the same varna and kshatriya, vaisya and sudra girls are suitable. First one should marry girl from the same varna only. Later if there is desire for enjoyment, one can properly marry girls not from the same varna. Thus, girls from four varnas are suitable for brahmana; for kshatriya, three varnas; for vaisya, two varnas and for sudra, one varna.
2. Manu adds that in case brahmana and kshatriya are unable to wed girls from the same varna first, they can marry girl not from the same varna; but never sudra girl first - No dharmasastra says that even in danger, brahmana and kshatriya can marry sudra girl; they can accept only due to desire.
3. Manu about the blemish of marrying sudra girl first - Dvijas, who marry sudra girls due to infatuation, make their progeny and the families get sudra nature.
4. Manu says that marrying only sudra girl and begetting child through her are sins for brahmana - Brahmana who marries and unites with sudra girl without marrying girl from the same varna will go to naraka. If he begets child through her, he will lose brahmana nature.
5. Manu establishes his opinion after quoting others’ views - The view of Atri and Gautama is that one who marries sudra girl becomes ‘fallen’. Saunaka’s view is that he becomes ‘fallen’ by begetting child through sudra girl and not by uniting with her alone. He feels that he should not unite with her during Rtukala (period favourable for conception). Bhrigu opines that without begetting child through girl from the same varna, if brahmana begets child only through sudra girl, he becomes ‘fallen’. As Manu’s dharmasastra is told through the mouth of Bhrigu, Bhrigu’s opinion is all Manu’s opinion also.
6. Yagnavalkya - No need to write separately, as it is same as Manu’s view. In Chandrika also, it is the same.
7. Paitinasi - If brahmana girl is not available, girls from other varnas may be accepted. For sudra girl, man from all three varnas can become husband as ‘Pratiloma’.
8. Jatukarni - Brahmana can observe ‘snathaka’ vrata if he does not get brahmana girl. He can get sons through girl of kshatriya or vaisya varna.
9. Narada - For brahmana, girls from the other three varnas can become wives. This is ‘Anuloma’. For sudra girl, men from the upper three varnas can become husbands. This is ‘Pratiloma’. For kshatriya, girls from vaisya and sudra varnas can become wives. For vaisya, sudra girl can become wife. For vaisya girl, man from upper two varnas and for kshatriya girl, man from the upper one varna can become husband.
10. Vishnu - For dvija, sudra girl can never become wife suitable for dharma. She will be there only for pleasure for the brahmana who has lost discrimination due to lust.
11. Vyasa - The semen of dvija, which drops in the organ of a sudra woman, wails shouting ‘Ha,ha’ and curses him: ‘I fell in a sinful pit; this sinner who lost discrimination due to lust will push me into naraka; may this fellow go to naraka soon’.
12. Vasishtha - Some say that one can marry sudra girl without mantras. That should not be done. The family will go down quickly; it will stop one from attaining swarga.
13. Manu - There is no prayaschitta for one who drinks from the lips of a sudra woman, lies down with her in the same bed and begets son through her. He becomes ‘fallen’. Even high families go down by resorting to painting, sculpture etc., lending money on interest, begetting sons through sudra woman alone, selling cow, horse, chariot etc., doing agriculture, service to king, performing yaga for the ‘fallen’ et al, atheistic intellect and not studying Veda.
14. This marriage with woman not from the same varna pertains to different yuga, as it is prohibited in Kaliyuga.
(This entire chapter therefore is not applicable to Kaliyuga).
89. Characteristics of Vara (Bridegroom)
1. Manu - If a vara, who is superb in family etc., handsome and of the same varna is available, the wise father of girl should marry her off even if it is prior to the marriageable age (8th).
2. Yama - Wise persons should give girl in marriage after examining seven qualities of the vara - family, virtuousness, health, age, vidya, wealth and relations; the rest need not be examined.
3. Vishnu’s statement, ‘In danam of girl, the brahmana’s family (lineage) should be investigated; Vedic knowledge and wealth need not be examined. The same in sraadham also; vidya is not important’ only signifies that lineage is prime; it is not for rejecting vidya. Hence Aasvalayana said that lineage must be investigated first.
4. Aapasthambha - Vara, with relatives, good conduct, good look and proficiency in sastra and who is free from disease is the best.
5. Gautama - Daughter should be given to vara with vidya, observance of prescribed karmas, relatives and good conduct.
6. Saatatapa - Vara should be one, who likes the girl and who has good lineage, conduct, appearance, scholarship, wisdom and youth.
7. Yagnavalkya - Vara should have qualities mentioned above, be of same varna, should have studied Veda, have been examined for potency, be youthful, wise and popular among people.
8. Katyayana - Women have been created for bearing child. Woman is called kshetra (field); man has bija (seed). Kshetra should be given to one who has bija; hence bija should be examined.
9. Narada on the method of testing bija - One, whose bija floats in water and urine has sound and is bubbly, is man. One who is contrary is ‘shanda (eunuch). Scholars have found in sastras that eunuch is of 14 types. Some of them can be treated; some cannot be. We shall discuss them. The 14 types are - Nisarga shanda, baddha, paksha shanda, Gurusapa shanda, roga shanda, Devakopa shanda, earshya shanda, sevya, vatharethas, mukhepaka, aakshipta, moghabija, saalina and anyaapati. Nisarga shanda is one who by nature is without penis and testicles. Badha is one who has lost testicles by being cut off. Pakshashanda is one who is capable of uniting with his wife only once in a fortnight. Those who lost potency owing to curse of Guru, disease or anger of Devas are respectively Gurusapa shanda, roga shanda and Devakopa shanda. One who gains potency in jealousy is earshya shanda. One who gains potency owing to service of a woman is sevya shanda. One who lost semen due to ‘vata’ (wind) is vatarethas. Mukhepaka is one who has manliness only in face, but not in sexual organ. Aakshipta shanda is one whose semen is restricted. Moghabija is one whose semen is not capable of impregnation. Saalina is one who lost manliness due to lack of courage or disturbance. Anyaapati is one who is manly with women other than his wife. Of these 14 types, the first two are incurable. Paksha shnda is also to be rejected. The next three can be tested upto one year. Mature girl can abandon the four starting from earshya shanda like a ‘fallen’ man. Woman can test aakshipta and moghabija for six months after marriage and if he is still impotent, she can abandon him and remarry. Saalina improves when he unites with a courageous woman; his wife should instruct him secretly. Anyaapati can be abandoned and the woman can remarry. These are the words of Brahmadeva. The statement that a woman can remarry thus applies to different yuga, as Kaliyugadharma states that woman cannot remarry.
10. Katyayana - Mad man, ‘fallen’, one who has leprosy, eunuch, one of same gotra, blind, deaf and epileptic are defective; they cannot be varas. The defects of girl were also told earlier. Wise people should not give daughter to people at a long distance, those who have not learnt vidya, those who adopt the route to Liberation, the valourous and the poor.
11. In Aparargam - Severity, harsh words, troubling and non - observance of prescribed karmas show that the man is born in mixed jati.
90. Time for Kanyadanam
1. Bodhayana - Daughter, who is ‘nagnika’, should be given to brahmachari of good qualities. If such a person of good qualities is not available, kanya should be given to one of lesser qualities. Marriage should not be postponed till her attaining puberty (going into menses).
2. Vasishtha - When daughter is nagnika, she should be given in danam with the fear of arrival of Rtukala (period of menses). If unmarried girl has attained puberty, the father will get sin.
3. Vasishtha on the characteristics of Nagnika - Girl is called ‘Nagnika’ till the time she does not conceal her parts to be concealed with shyness in front of men. Till the time she does not wear (regular) dress, plays in dust and does not know faults, she is called ‘Nagnika’.
4. Samvartha - Daughter should be given in marriage while she does not feel shy, plays in dust and stands in the route of cows. Eight year old girl is called Gowri; 9 year old, Rohini; 10 year old, Kanya; beyond this, she is called ‘Rajasvala’ (mature - going into menses).
5. To say that beyond 10 years of age, girl is ‘Rajasvala’ is the opinion about some people, because there is no rule that every girl will go into menses at that age. He says also - If the father does not give his daughter in danam even after she attains 12th year, he gets every month the sin of drinking her blood. If unmarried girl becomes ‘rajasvala’, her father, mother and elder brother, all three go to naraka. One who gives in danam, girl who is Gowri attains swarga; Rohini, Vaikuntha; Kanya, Brahmaloka; Rajasvala, naraka called Rorava. Hence daughter should be given in marriage before she becomes ‘Rtumati’ (going into menses). It is praiseworthy to give daughter in marriage in her 8th year. Somadeva enjoys the girl when hair starts growing on her body, Gandharva enjoys at the time of seeing menstrual blood and Pavaka enjoys at the time she starts developing breasts.
6. Yama - Girl is called Gowri in 8th year; Nagnika in 9th year; Kanyaka in 10th year; Vrishali in 12th year. Vrishali is same as Rajasvala, as Devala says, ‘Barren woman is called vrishali; woman whose all children have died and is childless is also vrishali; girl who has become rajasvala before marriage is also vrishali’.
7. Aapasthambha - Eight year old girl is called Gowri; 9 year old, Rohini; 10 year old, Kanya; beyond this, she is called ‘Rajasvala’ (mature - going into menses). In 12th year, girl goes into menses; this is based on general observation; not to say that girl goes into menses only in 12th year, as sighting of menstrual blood happens even before 12th year in case of some.
8. Yama and Samvartha - 10 year old girl is Kanya; beyond that, she is Rajasvala.
9. Hence it is established that till the girl goes into menses she is Kanya. That is why Yama says, ‘Before girl attains puberty she should be given in marriage’.
10. Manu also - Thirty year old man should marry 12 year old girl.
11. Know that this is with reference to not having gone into menses. That is why Brihaspati - If unmarried girl living with her father attains puberty, her father gets the sin of killing of embryo. She will be called ‘vrishali’. One who marries her due to infatuation is called ‘vrishalipati’. He is unfit for conversation and sitting in row together (‘pankthi’). He is always impure (aasoucham). Every day he gets the sin of killing brahmana. He can expiate the sin of uniting with her for one day, by taking food from bhiksha (alms) for three years and doing japa. If he unites with vrishali for one month, he will become sudra in this birth itself. He will be born a dog after death.
12. Narada - The number of Rtukalas (periods favourable for conception between menses periods) gone by for unmarried girl, that many Brahmahatyas go to her father.
13. Yagnavalkya - The father, who does not give his daughter in marriage, gets the sin of killing of embryo in every Rtu (menses period).
14. Vyaghrapada - The time specified for upanayanam of boys is suitable for marriage of girls. In place of upanayanam of girls, Manu prescribed marriage.
15. Yama - Grandfather (Brahma) said that marriage is the upanayanam for girls. Hence 8th year from conception or from birth is most recommended. If there is doubt that adharmic marriage may result in the absence of favourable place and time or equal vara may not be available, marriage of girl can be performed even in younger age. When the girl is younger, if a vara of good qualities is available, marriage can be done due to fear of place and time, though the age for marriage has not yet arrived.
16. Prajapati accepts the marriage of young girl and mentions the speciality of samskara - In case girl, married before completion of 2 years of age, dies, she should not be buried; cremation with mantra should be done.
17. Manu’s statement, ‘Even if girl has attained puberty, she may live in her father’s home till her death; daughter should never be given to man of no good qualities’ is meant to discourage giving daughter to vara of no good qualities when vara of good qualities is available and not to impose blanket ban on giving daughter to vara of poor qualities.
18. Yama and Bodhayana in the same vein - In case vara of good qualities is available, girl may be given even when she is ‘nagnika’. If superior vara is not available in proper time, daughter should be given to ordinary vara at least. One should not keep her unmarried till she attains puberty.
19. Yama says that in case father does not get his daughter married even after she has attained puberty, she can pick up on her own equal vara - In case daughter not given in marriage lives with her father in her 12th year, her father will get the sin of killing of embryo. That girl may choose her husband on her own.
20. Know that choice by girl like this can be made after 3 years from the time of sighting of menstrual blood. Bodhayana also - The father who does not give his daughter, who has attained puberty, in danam for three years, will get the sin equal to killing brahmana; no doubt. This is in case nobody has asked him for his daughter. Manu’s view is that in case the father does not give his daughter even when asked by vara, he will get the sin of killing of brahmana for every occurrence of menses individually. The daughter, who has attained puberty, should await her father’s order till completion of 3 years. In 4th year, she on her own can get equal vara. If equal vara is not available, inferior vara should at least be chosen by her.
21. Manu - The daughter, who has attained puberty, should await her father’s order till completion of 3 years. Later she on her own can get equal vara. By getting vara on her own in this manner without being given by her father, she does not get any sin; nor does the husband get any sin. The daughter, who chooses her own husband, should not take ornaments given earlier to her by her father, mother or brother. If she takes, she becomes a thief. Husband, who accepts girl in this manner, should not give any dowry to her father. Her father loses relationship with her because he spoiled the girl’s Rtus (menses periods, followed by periods favourable for conception).
91. Rules in case of Girl going into menses in the midst of
1. Atri - During marriage when the time for homa is approaching, if the girl gets her periods, what to do? Making the girl bathe and worshipping Agni, ‘ahuti’ (oblation) should be done with ‘yajana:’ mantra and then homa is to be performed. If the girl gets her periods after completion of Pradhana homa, the rest of the activities are to be performed after 3 days.
2. In Smritibhaskaram - If the girl gets her periods while commencing the ‘vivaha homa’, the souple should have separate bed, seat, food etc. After she takes bath on 4th day, ‘vivaha homa’ should be performed in that Agni as laid down; this is the summary of Smritis.
3. Yagnavalkya says that the king should punish the father who first gives the girl in danam and then takes her away - Daughter can be given in danam only once. One who steals the girl who has been given in danam is to be punished like a thief.
4. Manu - Dividing wealth is only once. Giving daughter in danam is also only once. Giving other things in danam is also only once. These three are only once for the righteous. After giving daughter to a person, one should not give her to another person. One who gives that way will get the sin of ‘Purushanruta dosha’. The meaning is that he will get the sin mentioned in the sastra, ‘One who speaks untruth in the matter of horse will get the sin of killing a hundred people. One who speaks untruth in the matter of man will get the sin of killing a thousand people’.
5. Kasyapa - Kanyas of 7 types called ‘Punarbhu’ should be rejected, as they are from inferior lineage. These 7 types are: girl given in word; girl given in mind; girl who has undergone ‘kankana bandham’ (fastening of marriage - string around the wrist); girl who has been given in danam with ceremonial water; girl who has undergone ‘Panigrahanam’ (clasping hands); girl who has gone round Agni; girl born of ‘Punarbhu’. These girls will burn away the lineage like fire. Tree burnt in fire comes to life sometimes after a long time. The lineage burnt by relation with ‘Punarbhu’ will never come to life.
6. Manu - The virtuous of ancient or present times never have given girl to a new person, after agreeing earlier to give to another person.
7. Bodhayana - ‘Punarbhu’ is of 7 types: girl given in word; girl given in mind; girl who has gone round Agni; girl who has walked seven steps (saptapadi); girl who has been enjoyed; pregnant girl; girl who has delivered. If one accepts her, he will not get child or dharma.
8. Aapasthambha - Girl who has been given to another in word or with ceremonial water, girl who covers her body with shirt etc., girl with reddish hair, girl who walks like a bull, girl with no shine, hunchback, girl with wide knees, girl with no hair, girl with small body, girl who became daughter of another lineage, girl who has sighted menstrual blood, girl who guards field etc., girl friend, girl born after vara, but in the same year and girl older than vara should be rejected.
9. Statements like the above rejecting girl already given to another person refer to girl who has been given to vara free from blemish. Because Narada - The king should punish like a thief, one who has given his daughter to a person as per rules and later not actually giving him.
10. Gautama - Even if committed, girl should not be given in adharma.
11. Yagnavalkya - Even a girl already given can be given to another very good vara if he is available afterwards.
12. Kasyapa - Girl already given to vara not from good lineage, not having good conduct, eunuch et al, the ‘fallen’ man, epileptic, vara in evil occupation, diseased, pretender and vara of same gotra can be given to another vara, if she has not undergone samskara with vivaha mantras. A person who gives the girl to another person without the above reasons should be punished. He should be made to pay the expense incurred by the previous vara with interest.
13. Saatatapa - If the vara to whom word was given is devoid of good qualities and conduct, the girl can be given to another vara who has good qualities and conduct. There is no fault in rejecting vara who has no good qualities and conduct.
14. Katyayana - If the vara originally chosen is from different jati, ‘fallen’, eunuch, in evil occupation, of same gotra, slave or diseased for long, the girl already given can be given to another vara with dress and ornaments. If girl who has been accepted with per proper rituals is condemnable, diseased, living in far away place and given in deceit, she can be abandoned.
15. Narada - One should not criticise faultless girl falsely; also faultless vara. If the fault is genuine, there is no sin in leaving these two.
16. Know that these statements apply to leaving before Saptapadi. In Chandrika - If the vara’s fault comes to light or if he dies after danam in word, but before Saptapadi, the girl can be given to another; not after Saptapadi.
17. Manu - The status of ‘Patni’ (wife) comes through the mantras uttered in marriage. Scholars should know that this has its finality in Saptapadi. The meaning is that even if the fault of girl or vara comes to light, the girl or vara should not be abandoned.
18. Yama - By danam in word or with ceremonial water, the vara does not become husband of the girl. He becomes husband after Panigrahanam and Saptapadi.
19. Vasishtha - In marriage which binds man and woman, first ‘varana’ (choice) and then samskara called Panigrahanam is done. In between these two, if fault (of Vara) comes to light the choice (and agreement) is not in force. The girl can be given to another. The meaning is that the man does not become husband merely by danam.
20. Vyasa - If vara dies after danam in word or before Saptapadi, the girl can be given to another. The same is in the case of vara of same gotra. If the samskara of marriage is not done, the girl can be given to another.
21. By this it is clear that even if vara dies before Saptapadi, there is no widowhood for the girl.
22. Vasishtha in the same vein - After giving the girl by agreement in word and with ceremonial water, if vara dies before samskara is done with vivaha mantras, that girl belongs to her father and not to the vara.
23. Katyayana - After choosing and agreeing about the girl, if vara goes abroad and does not return, the girl can wait upto three sightings of menstrual blood and then marry a different vara.
24. Narada - After choosing and agreeing about the girl, if vara goes abroad and does not return, the girl can wait upto three sightings of menstrual blood and then marry a different vara.
25. Manu on the speciality of sulka dana (offer of money by boy to girl’s father) - If vara dies before marriage, but after giving sulka, the girl should be given to her brother, if she agrees. If the vara who gave sulka and dowry for the girl does not come back, the girl can be given to another as per rules after waiting for a year. If vara dies after danam in word, his brother should marry the girl.
26. Katyayana - If the original vara to whom danam in word was given does not come back, the girl is given in danam in word to another and before marriage the first vara comes and if he has better qualities than the second, the girl should be given to him only. If the girl is given in danam to many and if all of them come before marriage, the first intended vara should get the girl. If others come after marriage, they should receive their money back.
27. Vasishtha says that the girl can be given to another even after Panigrahanam - Even after Panigrahanam, the girl who has only undergone the vivaha samskara, can be given in marriage to another if she has not attained puberty. In another Smriti - If vara dies before Saptapadi, the girl can be given to another. Some say that this applies upto union with the boy. Some say that this is even after sighting of first menstrual blood. Some say that this is upto becoming pregnant.
28. Narada - Even if a girl is married, if she has not united with the boy, she is like Kanya only. She can be given in marriage to another. Bodhayana - Even after danam and vivaha homa, if the boy dies, the girl can be given to another in marriage if first menstrual blood has not been sighted. Manu - Girl can get different husband in 5 conditions: if the boy goes abroad and does not return, dies, becomes sanyasi, is eunuch or ‘fallen’.
29. These statements referring to remarriage even after Saptapadi apply to marriages in earlier yugas. Because -
30. Vyasa - Remarriage of girl already married, greater share for elder son, killing of cow, begetting son through brother’s wife and carrying ‘kamandalu’ (water - pot) - these five are prohibited in Kaliyuga.
31. Kratu - Begetting son through husband’s brother, remarriage of girl, killing of cow in yaga and carrying kamandalu should not be done in Kaliyuga.
32. Bodhayana - Rule followed in earlier yuga should not be followed in this yuga. That was the dharma of the previous yuga, like husband’s brother begetting son through widow.
33. In Chandrika also - Begetting son through husband’s brother, killing of cow, carrying of kamandalu, remarriage of girl who has not attained puberty and making man into sacrificial animal and doing yaga - these five must be avoided in Kaliyuga. The statement of Yagnavalkya and others, ‘Brother - in - law, sapinda or person of same gotra can unite with widow who has no son, in her period favourable for conception, with elders’ permission, after applying ghee on his body; he can unite till she becomes pregnant; if he unites afterwards, he will be ‘fallen’. The son born this way is called ‘kshetraja’, should be discarded in Kaliyuga. ‘Gomedham’ is torturing the cow. ‘Kamandalu’ refers to carrying kamandalu (water - pot) made of clay. Bodhayana et al have said, ‘Brahmadeva and sages have prescribed kamandalu for brahmanas’ purity. Hence it should always be carried’. ‘Akshata’ refers to girl who has not attained puberty. ‘Purushamedham’ is a yaga. The meaning is that these should not be resorted to in Kaliyuga.
34. Narada says that even ‘Akshata’ girl is not allowed - Even ‘Akshata’ (girl who has not attained puberty), if she has undergone Panigrahanam, will be called ‘Punarbhu’ in remarriage and she should not be married.
35. Yagnavalkya also - Whether the girl is ‘Akshata’ or ‘kshata’ (girl who has not or has attained puberty), she will be called ‘Punarbhu’ if she goes for remarriage.
36. Narada says that the king should punish one who gave the girl without disclosing her defect - The king should levy the penalty of ‘Purvasahasam’ on one who gives a defective girl without disclosing her defect in advance. ‘Purvasahasam’ is 750 coins.
37. Yagnavalkya says, ‘One who cheats by giving girl without disclosing her defect should be levied a penalty of ‘Uttamasahasam’. One who rejected a girl with no defect should also face the same penalty. One who defames falsely should also face a penalty of 100 coins’. Chandrika says that this statement of Yagnavalkya refers to severe defect in the girl. ‘Uttamasahasam’ is 1800 coins.
38. Narada - One who rejects a girl free from defects, after accepting her, should be punished. He should marry that girl only.
92. Persons Eligible for Kanyadanam
1. Yagnavalkya - Father, father’s father, brother, relative in same lineage and mother are eligible for Kanyadanam (giving girl in danam) in the order of preference. If they do not give danam in time, they will get the sin of killing of embryo in every monthly menses occurrence. If nobody is there, the girl can choose an eligible vara (bridegroom).
2. Narada - Father can give his daughter in danam on his own. Those eligible for Kanyadanam are: with father’s permission, brother, mother’s father, mother’s brother, relative in same lineage and other relatives; if none of them is there, mother who is able; if she is not there, persons from the same jati. If none of them is available, the girl can inform the king and choose on her own vara, known to her, of the same varna and equal to her in lineage, conduct, strength and sastra. She can observe dharmas with him and beget children. Action taken by one who has lost control of himself through intoxication etc., though independent, is deemed to have been taken (complete).
3. Manu - To whomsoever father, or brother with his permission, gives in danam, the girl should serve him throughout his life. After his death also, she should not transgress the ordinary rules. The choice of only two persons in this context (for Kanyadanam) is only to establish their primacy and not to reject others.
93. Types of Marriage like Braahma etc.
1. Manu - There are 8 types of marriages for all the four varnas, which will do them good here and hereafter. I shall briefly tell about them. Braahmam, Daivam, Aarsham, Praajapatyam, Aasuram, Gaandharvam, Rakshasam and Paisacham are the 8 types. Of these, Paisacham is the worst. Mention of Praajapatyam after Aarsham instead of before it is due to fear of loss of metre in the verse.
2. Manu tells their characteristics in 8 verses - Braahma dharma is calling on his own vara, learned in Vedas and observing karmas and giving girl in danam to him after decorating her with special dress, ornaments etc. Here ‘dharma’ means marriage, as marriage is means to dharma. ‘Brahma’ means dharma; As dharma is in large measure, this marriage is called ‘Braahmam’.
3. Giving girl in danam to Ritvik in yaga like Jyotishtomam as per rules is ‘Daivam’. As danam is given to one who is entitled to acts related to Devas, it is called ‘Daivam’.
4. A ‘Gomithuna’ is a cow and a bull together. ‘Aarsham’ is taking one or two ‘Gomithunams’ from vara for dharma and giving the girl to him in danam as per rules. While teaching vidya, Rishis used to do so without specifying remuneration for fear of sale of vidya and they used to accept minor service etc. from the disciple. The marriage is called ‘Aarsham’ because of commonness with this.
5. Telling the vara and the girl to do dharma jointly, getting vara to say also, worshipping him and giving him the Kanya is ‘Praajapatyam’. As Prajapati has the nature of grihastha primarily and here also grihastha nature is primary, it is called ‘Praajapatyam’.
6. Getting vara to give money beyond capacity to girl or her relatives and giving Kanya in danam to him in violation of sastras and prevalent practices is ‘Aasuram’. As it is the practice of Asuras to snatch others’ belongings improperly, this marriage is called ‘Aasuram’ due to commonness with that practice.
7. When Kanya and vara, owing to mutual liking, join right upto sexual union, it is called ‘Gaandharvam’. This is ‘Gaandharvam’ as it is based on passion. Gandharvas are well - known for passion. Sruti also says so. Bhagavan Valmiki said, ‘Gandharvas are highly passionate; Nagas are highly furious’.
8. While carrying the girl away by force, breaking and slaughtering those who come in the way and appropriating the wailing girl is ‘Rakshasam’. As this is primarily based on violence, it is called ‘Rakshasam’.
9. Uniting in a secret place with girl, who is in sleep, intoxication and inattention is the most sinful ‘Paisacham’, the 8th type of marriage. As this is similar to the action of goblins, it is ‘Paisacham’.
10. Manu tells about the fruit of marriages like Braahmam - If the son of girl who was married in ‘Braahmam’ is doer of dharma, he will release from sin twentyone generations - the previous ten generations, the succeeding ten generations and himself. The son of girl, married in ‘Daivam’ will release from sin 15 generations - previous 7, succeeding 7 and himself; son of girl in ‘Aarsham’, 7 generations - previous 3, succeeding 3 and himself; son of girl in ‘Praajapatyam’, 13 generations - previous 6, succeeding 6 and himself.
11. Manu also tells about the fruits of the four types of marriages in this world after mentioning the fruits in the world hereafter - In all the four marriages like Braahmam, sons born will have the lustre of a great brahmana, be liked by the virtuous, have good appearance, virtue and good qualities, have wealth, fame and objects of enjoyment and be mindful of dharma. They will also live a hundred years.
12. Manu now tells about sons born after marriages like Aasuram - Sons born in the four balance marriages will be violent, given to falsehood and haters of Veda dharmas. Through irreproachable marriages, irreproachable children will be born. Through blameworthy marriages, blameworthy children will be born. Hence one should refrain from blameworthy marriages. Here blameworthy means forbidden; if not, the rule that marriages like Gaandharva are acceptable for kshatriyas will look futile.
13. Yagnavalkya - Calling the vara and giving him in danam girl decorated as per one’s capacity is ‘Braahmam’. The son born of her will purify 21 generations of the giver - the previous 10, the succeeding 10 and himself. Giving in danam to Ritvik in yaga is ‘Daivam’. Getting two cows as fee and giving girl in danam is ‘Aarsham’. Son born in ‘Daivam’ marriage will purify a total of 14 generations including previous and succeeding. Son born in ‘Aarsham’ marriage will purify a total of 6 generations including previous and succeeding. Giving Kanya in danam and saying, ‘Both of you observe dharma jointly’ is ‘Praajapatyam’. Son born in this marriage will purify the previous 6 generations, the succeeding 6 and himself. Getting money and giving girl in danam is ‘Aasuram’. ‘Gaandharvam’ is vara and the girl making signal and uniting. ‘Rakshasam’ is stealing the girl in war. ‘Paisacham’ is taking the girl deceitfully.
14. Manu - The first six types of marriage are as per dharma for brahmana; the four from ‘Aasuram’ are as per dharma for kshatriya; the same except Raakshasam are as per dharma for vaisya and sudra. Scholars say that the first four marriages are exemplary for brahmana, Rakshasam for kshatriya and Aasuram for vaisya and sudra. Manu also on other opinion - Three out of the five starting from ‘Praajapatyam’ are as per dharma. Paisacham and Aasuram should never be done. It is clear that this opinion is common to all.
15. In Chandrika - The first four are good for brahmana; Gaandharva and Rakshasa for kshatriya; Aasuram for vaisya and sudra. Paisacham is not good for anyone.
16. Vatsa says that if other marriages do not happen, Paisacham can be resorted to – If all other methods fail, one can get a girl, who is alone, at least by stealthy marriage.
17. Aapasthambha - The first three are good; of them the former is better than the latter. Progeny is born in accordance with the type of marriage.
18. Bodhayana - Marriages are of 8 types. After examining (adherence to) sastra and good conduct, giving the girl to brahmachari, who likes her, is Braahmam. Decorating the girl with good dress and ornaments and giving her to vara saying, ‘Do dharma with her’ is Praajapatyam. Out of Lajahomas, after the first homa is over, giving to the father of Kanya, a bull and a cow is Aarsham. While giving dakshinas in yaga, giving the girl along with dakshina to Ritvik at the altar is Daivam. Uniting in mutual love of girl and vara is Gaandharvam. Influencing the relatives of the girl with wealth and getting her is Aasuram. Appropriating the girl using force is Rakshasam. Taking away girl overcome by sleep, intoxication or inattention is Paisacham. Of these, the first four are appropriate for brahmana. The former of them is better than the latter. The latter four are for kshatriya et al. Of them, the latter is inferior to the former. Of the eight, the sixth and seventh are suitable for kshatriya, as wealth and strength are primary for kshatriya. The fifth and eighth are suitable for vaisya and sudra, because they will have wives who do not follow many rules as they work in agriculture and service. Some say that Gaandharvam is commendable for all, as the union is based on mutual love. Progeny is born in accord with the type of marriage.
19. Gautama - The eight marriages are as before. The first four are good; some say that six are good.
20. Some say that Aarsha marriage is also not commendable, as fee is collected in that. Manu also - In Aarsha marriage, some say that ‘Gomithuna’ can be collected; but this is not appropriate. Whether the fee is small or large, it amounts to sale.
21. Some explain this verse in a different way - In Aarsha marriage, some call ‘Gomithuna’ as fee; this is falsehood. Purchase suitable for trade will be small or large, depending on place and time. In Aarsha marriage, as the Gomithuna is laid down, it is not purchase.
22. Devala also - The first four marriages do not deviate from dharma, as danam is given with ceremonial water and there is no fee. They are suitable for brahmanas. They protect both the lineages (of girl and vara).
23. Aapasthambha also - Giving danam to father of the girl in Aarsha marriage is also seen in a Veda. That Sruti - ‘Hence vara should give a chariot and 100 cows to girl’s father. Accepting them, the girl’s father should give gifts in the form of land, ornaments etc. to vara and the girl and falsify that it is purchase.’ This danam is driven by desire, for begetting sons like Rishis. Hence this danam is for dharma and not for purchase. As Srutis say, ‘One without wife is not eligible for yaga’, one with wife alone is eligible for dharma. As marriage is for doing dharma, the danam for that is for dharma only. The word ‘kraya’ (purchase) found in one Smriti is actually in praise; it does not mean actual purchase. Why? As the relation of the couple is for dharma only. Hence as danam is meant for dharma, and as Smriti says that all danas should be given with ceremonial water, vara should give danam to girl’s father with water only. The girl’s father also should give danam of the girl with ceremonial water only.
24. As it is stated that 100 cows are to be given, it is as per dharma if, after receiving in excess of one ‘Gomithunam’ from the vara, the girl’s father returns it in the form of house, land, ornaments etc. It should not be doubted that as money is taken, the marriage is Aasuram. If girl’s father takes money for his enjoyment, it is Aasuram. Gautama also - To influence the girl’s relatives through money is Aasuram. Haradatta says that if the money is given to girl and marriage conducted, it is not Aasuram.
25. Manu says that taking money from vara for the girl’s dress, ornaments etc. is not faulty - If the girl’s relatives do not enjoy the money received from the vara for the girl, but give it to her, it is not sale. It will be honouring girls.
26. Manu confirms the same in 8 verses - Father, brother, husband and brother - in - law, desirous of auspiciousness, should honour women and decorate them with dress and ornaments. Devatas are pleased with the family where women are honoured. All dharmic acts are fruitless in the family where women are not honoured. The family, where daughter, sister, woman in family et al feel grieved, will be destroyed soon. If they are happy, that family will always grow. The homes where female relatives curse, not being honoured, are fully destroyed like through ‘Abhichara’ (black magic). Hence people, desirous of wealth, should honour these women with dress, ornaments and food on festive days etc. Auspiciousness will continue in the family, in which husband is happy with his wife and wife is happy with her husband. If woman is not happy, she will not make her husband happy. If husband is not happy, the growth of progeny will not happen. If woman is happy, that whole family will shine. If she is unhappy, that entire family will not shine. The meaning is that accepting money from the vara for the girl’s decoration is therefore not flawed.
27. Manu says that if girl’s father et al accept money for their use, it is faulty - The girl’s father should not accept any fee. One who accepts out of greed is said to have sold the girl. If girl’s relatives enjoy money meant for the girl, or servants, dresses or vehicles received as fees, those sinners go to naraka.
28. Even if he is sudra, the giver of girl should not accept any fee. One who accepts fee indeed sells the girl indirectly. We have not heard even in previous births about sale of girl on receipt of money hidden in the name of fee.
29. Samvartha - The foolish sinners who sell the girl fall into terrible naraka and remain there till the time of Pralaya. The girl purchased with money cannot become wife. She is not eligible for karmas for gods or Pitrus, as she is equal to servant. As the man who married her is ‘vrishalipati’, he is not eligible to sit in (brahmanas’) row or conversation.
30. Yama - One who receives money by sale of human being, will live on the urine and excreta of that person in his next birth. The foolish sinners who sell girl fall into terrible naraka. They burn their lineage upto seven generations. One who sells the girl for his living actually consumes the urine and excreta of that girl as well as the vara.
31. Question: Devala says that accepting girl as per rules by giving fee is the sixth type of marriage called Aasuram. How is it that Manu et al also accepted this? Answer: If the previous marriages do not happen, then Aasuram can be resorted to as emergency measure.
32. Narada also - In the marriages well known as 8 types, the former is better than the latter. If the former does not happen, the latter is also creditable.
33. In Chandrika also - The remarks of Kasyapa and Manu critical of Aasura marriage are meant to reject the inferior marriage if better marriage is possible.
34. Here some opine - Gautama et al have forbidden sale of land, saying, ‘Land, paddy, barley, sheep, horse, bull and cow should not be sold’ and ‘There is no sale of non - moving objects’. Still Vignaneswara says that since danam of land is praised saying ‘One who gives land in danam and one who receives the same acquire merit and certainly go to swarga’, land should be sold, even if sale were necessary, in the form of danam along with gold and ceremonial water. In the same manner, here sale of girl and Aasura marriage are forbidden. Also danam of kanya is praised through passages like: ‘One who gives kanya in danam does not go to naraka; Danam of kanya is giver of great strength and equal to yaga called Visvajit; One who gives girl in danam as per rules gets the fruit of performing 100 times 100 yagas like Jyotishtomam, Atiratram etc.; Danas of these ten - Kanya, horse, til, elephant, female servant, house, land, chariot, girl and milch cow - are Mahadanas.; Danam of a thousand chariots is equal to the dana of girl; Danas of food, vidya, girl, abhaya (fearlessness), cow, land, gold, horse and elephant are superior.’ As right to Sroutha and Smartha karmas like Agnihotra etc. is obtained only after Panigrahanam, marriage is essential for observing karmas. Hence, in case it is not possible to get the girl without giving money, as Smriti says ‘For brahmanas, marriage with ceremonial giving of water is the best’, money should be given with ceremonial water and girl should also be accepted with ceremonial water.
35. It should not be doubted that as Saptapadi etc. are absent in marriages like Aasuram, the religious status of husband and wife is also absent, as the samskara of marriage is laid down after acceptance of the girl even in those marriages. Devala also - In marriages like Gaandharva, the marriage rituals must be gone through with Agni as witness afterwards.
36. In Grihyaparisishta also - In Gaandharva, Aasura, Paisacha and Rakshasa marriages, the acceptance of girl first, followed by homam is laid down.
37. Hence Vasishtha says that the religious status of wife is not obtained only by kidnapping the girl by force - The girl, who has been kidnapped by force, can be given to another man, in case marriage rituals have not been undergone; she is like unmarried kanya only.
38. Manu on a particular part of marriage - Catching hold of the hand of kanya by the bridegroom is called Panigrahanam. This samskara has been prescribed in the marriages of women with men of same varna. In the case of marriages of women with men of different varna, the following is the rule: If a lower varna woman marries a man of higher varna, she should catch hold of an arrow if she is kshatriya; a whip if she is vaisya; the edge of the dress of the bridegroom if she is sudra.
94. Two auspicious observances at the same time are forbidden
1. Sangrahakara on two auspicious observances coming together - Marriage of boys, born of same mother, in the same year is forbidden. If they are born of different mothers, there is no bar. For girls also, the same rule applies; no doubt.
2. Varahamihira - As per Gargya’s instruction, marriage of children, born of same mother, in the same year is forbidden.
3. This is about performing the two marriages within 3 ritus. Garga also - marriage of children, born of same mother, in the same year within 6 months is forbidden. The marriages can be performed in another village; they should not be done in the same house.
4. Angiras - Marriage of children, born of same mother, in the same year is forbidden. Both auspicious ceremonies should not be done within 6 months. If the year differs, marriage can be done after 3 months. In Phalguna and Chaitra months, as the year differs, there is no need to have a gap of 6 months for performing marriage and upanayanam. After marriage of son, marriage of daughter should not be celebrated within 6 months. Upanayanam should not be peformed after marriage. Marriage can be performed after upanayanam.
5. Saatatapa - Mandanam and mundanam should not be performed in the same year. Mandanam means marriage and mundanam means upanayanam. Mandanam should be perormed first and mundanam later.
6. In Sridhariya - Daughter’s marriage within 6 months of son’s marriage, upanayanam within 6 months of marriage and chowlam within 6 months of upanayanam should not be done.
7. Garga - Marriage of son and daughter, born of same mother, should not be performed at the same time; nor upanayanam.
8. In Smritiratnam - After one auspicious ceremony is performed in the family, another one should not be done. If done without taking care, inauspiciousness will happen.
9. Angiras - After performing marriage of daughter, marriage of another daughter should not be performed within 4 days; afterwards it can be done.
10. Garga - People who know opine that after performing marriage of daughter, marriage of another daughter should not be performed within 4 days. In one home, only one auspicious ceremony should be performed. One who does many will be destroyed. In one home two auspicious ceremonies should not be done; a gap of 90 days should be maintained. If essential ceremony has to be performed, it can be done with another Acharya’s guidance.
11. Narada - Bhargava says that on the same day in different lagna, son’s marriage can be performed after daughter’s marriage. Manu, Vasishtha, Parasara et al say that marriages of son and daughter, born of same mother, can be performed in different months. Garga et al say that they can be performed on the same day in different lagnas. Vasishtha, Atri and Parasara say that these marriages can be performed even in the same lagna on the same day, but in different amsa; or in another village or in a different hall.
12. Brihaspati - Performing marriages of brothers on the same day in the same lagna, but in different amsa, is auspicious. These dharmas are laid down in accordance with different areas and family acharas. If two auspicious ceremonies are performed in the same house, whether in same or different lagnas, one of them will be destroyed; the other will prosper. One person should not perform the marriage and upanayanam of children, born of the same mother, on the same day. The same person should not perform the auspicious ceremonies for two sons or two daughters. Keeping a gap of 6 or 4 months or one year is auspicious.
13. Saatatapa - Two Agnikaryams (rituals in front of Fire) should not be done for children born of the same mother. This rule does not apply to children born of different mothers. After son’s upanayanam, marriage of daughter should not be performed within 6 months. After daughter’s marriage, upanayanam of son should also not be performed within 6 months.
14. These statements apply to children other than twins. In Kaladeepam, it is mentioned about twins - In the case of twins, auspicious ceremonies can be performed for two brothers, two sisters and brother and sister at the same time. The ceremonies can be done even if mothers are different. Among twins, the child born earlier is the elder.
95. Determination of seniority in twins
1. Manu - As there is no difference among children born of different wives of same varna, seniority is not determined based on mother. Seniority is based on birth. This rule is also mentioned for Subramania Ahvanam performed in Jyotishtoma yaga. Among twins, the one born earlier is elder.
2. In Sangraha also - Among twins, the one born earlier is said to be elder. As some foetuses are born after a long gestation period, senirity and Aadanam are dependent on birth only.
3. The Smriti passage, ‘In the case of babies in the same womb, be it male or female, the baby born first is younger and the one born later is elder’ refers to foetuses in up and down positions in the womb and not to those in side - by - side positions. Badarayanasmriti says that in the case of two foetuses in side - by - side positions, the one born earlier is the elder in Jatakarma etc.
4. Another Smriti on ‘Datta’ - If ‘Aurasa’ (own son) is born after adoption of ‘Datta’ son, it is not correct that ‘Datta’ is elder. The meaning is that Aurasa’s marriage can be performed before Datta’s. Datta cannot marry in his Janaka’s (biological father) gotra with homa. There is no bar for his son et al. One, born in the family of person who adopted the issue, can marry girl in the family of person, who gave the issue in danam after ten generations. Gautama says that this should also not be done.
5. For sons born of different mothers, marriage should be performed based on seniority determined by birth till the father is alive. Some say that after father’s death, this rule does not apply.
96. Bar on marriage etc. for the first - born in Jyeshta month
1. Angiras forbids celebrations in the month of birth and in Jyeshta month in respect of son born after Pumsavana samskara - Upanayanam, vrata, choulam, first marriage, snanam etc. are forbidden for the son born in the first conception in the months of birth and Jyeshtha.
2. In Kaladarsam also - Marriage should not be done for the son or daughter born in the first conception in Jyeshtha month.
3. In Ratnamala also - Marriage should not be done for the son or daughter born in the first conception in the month of birth, in the star of birth, on the day of birth and in Jyeshtha month.
4. Atri - Auspicious ceremonies should not be done for the son or daughter born in the first conception in the star of birth, on the day of birth, in the month of birth and in Jyeshtha month. Some perform upanayanam, marriage, Pratishtha etc. in those months/ days also.
5. Narada - Marriage should not be done for the son or daughter born in the first conception in the month of birth, in the star of birth, on the tithi of birth and day of birth. Marriage should not be done in Jyeshtha month for couple born in first conception. It is better if one of them is alone eldest; otherwise it is forbidden.
6. Garga - It is not good to do marriage for the eldest daughter as bride and eldest son as groom. The combination of both eldest is known as medium. Only one being eldest is auspicious.
97. Months in which Marriage is forbidden
1. Ashadha, Proushtapada, Magha and Margasirsha are four months in which samskaras for the three varnas are forbidden.
2. Mathsya - When Guru is in Simha rasi, in Adhikamasa, in ‘moudhyam’, ‘balyam’ and ‘vardhakam’ of Guru and Sukra, when Guru is in Janma and in Jyeshtha month in the case of the the eldest, auspicious ceremonies should not be performed.
3. Garga - Sages such as Kasyapa say that marriage should not be performed when Guru is in Simha rasi and Surya in Dhanur rasi.
4. Narada - Girl, who is married when Guru is in Simha rasi in Utharaphalguni star, is fortunate. Girl, who gets married when Guru is in Magha and Purvaphalguni stars, will be widowed. This is true of people north of Narmada river. Vyasa - That marriage should not be celebrated when Guru is in Simha rasi applies to areas north of Narmada; it is not forbidden in the south.
5. In Sridhariyam - That marriage should not be celebrated when Guru is in Simha rasi applies to areas north of Narmada; it is not forbidden in the south.
6. In Arnavam - Annaprasanam for boy and marriage in the month of birth and in birth star are prohibited in areas north of Narmada. Many agree that in areas south of Narmada, auspicious ceremonies like marriage in the month of birth are recommended as good.
7. Vyasa - Annaprasanam, Aatithyam, marriage and Vastukarma may be done in day or in night. The rest should be done only in day. When Surya is in Meenam, Dhanus and Simha rasis, chowlam, annaprasanam, marriage and upanayanam should not be performed. The months of Magha, Phalguna, Vaisakha and Jyeshtha are auspicious. Karthika and Margasirsha are medium; the rest are deplorable. When Surya is in Ardra star, no auspicious ceremony should be performed in 10 stars starting from Ardra. Gargya said that Pousha and Chaitra are auspicious; Brihaspati said that these are not auspicious. Some Maharshis say that Sravanam is auspicious; some disagree. The soura months of Kanya, Kumbha and Kataka are not auspicious. One should avoid the four chandra months starting from Ashadha and the month of Pousha. Gautama et al think that marriage can be done in all months.
8. Aapasthambha - All months other than Magha, Phalguna and Ashadha are good for marriage.
9. Aasvalayana - Some agree that marriage can be done in all months.
10. In Sangraha - Some say that in Dakshinayanam, Karthika, Aasvayujam and Sravanam are good for marriage; the other months are not good.
11. Vyasa on rule on this matter - Marriages not as per dharma can be done in all months.
12. Daksha - Brahmana can observe Rakshasam, Aasuram, Gandharvam and Paisacham type of marriages even in prohibited months and tithis.
13. In Grihyaparisishta - One has to look for good period only in marriages as per dharma; not in marriages not as per dharma.
14. Bodhayana - In case there is contradiction between statements in Jyotisha (astrology) and Smriti, Smriti should be followed, ignoring Jyotisha.
15. Vyasa - In the period between Vishnu’s ‘sayanam’ and ‘uththanam’, upanayanam, marriage or a big celebration should not be performed.
16. In Smrityarthasara - If man who is blind, leper, with rotten nails, maimed or lame, decides on the time of muhurtham, the family will be destroyed.
17. Devala prohibits celebration of humans in between that of Devas - When the celebration of Devas is in progress, there should be no celebration of humans; one who does it will be destroyed.
98. Testing of Growth
1. Aapasthambha - If the bride and her relatives agree, the following test may be done. The seeds of paddy, barley etc., the dust of the altar of Somayaga, the soil from field, cowdung and soil from cremation ground should be kept hidden in separate rolls and the bride asked to touch any one of them. Prosperity will depend on the material in the roll she touches. If it is seed, growth in progeny will happen; if it is dust of the altar of Somayaga, growth in yagna; if it is soil from field, growth of foodgrains; if it is cowdung, growth in cows; if it is soil from cremation ground, no growth, it is deplorable.
2. Aasvalayana - Eight materials should be kept hidden in eight rolls, the mantra ‘Rutamagre’ should be chanted and the bride should be asked to pick one of the rolls. Know that if the chosen roll contains soil from field, she will have children with food; if soil from cowpen, she will have cows; if soil from yaga altar, brahmatejas (splendour of Brahman); if soil from tank, everything; if soil from place of gambling, she will be characterless; if dust from road crossing, she will be a wanderer; if soil from infertile field, she will lack good fortune; if soil from cremation ground, she will kill her husband.
3. Haaritha - Marriage in exchange is forbidden. Two daughters should not be given to one man. Two sisters should not be given to two brothers. Smriti faults union with sister of father or mother, wife of mother’s brother, daughter - in - law, step - mother, sister, daughter of Acharya, wife of Acharya and own daughter and says that one who has union with them commits the sin of union with Guru’s wife. Sangrahakara says that either directly or by tradition, or by directions such as ‘mother - in - law and wife of elder brother are equal to mother’ and ‘all wives of father are mothers’, one should not marry the aforesaid relatives.
99. Rules for time of Kanyadanam
The statement “One should marry bride, who has had her food; receiving Gayatri ceremonially is also similar. The giver of Kanya should observe fast and give the bride to vara after worshipping him” relates to marriage not as per dharma. Vyasa in the same vein - Only in Gandharvam and Aasuram marriages, marrying bride after she has had her food is done. Kasyapa said that in marriages like Braahmam food should not be taken.
1. Saatatapa - In marriages like Braahmam, first homam and then acceptance of bride are done. In marriages like Aasuram this will alter. Or the order of these ceremonies will depend on directions in one’s Grihya.
2. Vyasa - The giver of Kanya should face east and the recipient should face north. If so the couple as well as the giver will have long life.
3. Skanda also - The giver should face east and give the young bride with ceremonial water to vara who faces north.
4. Vasishtha - In marriage and danam of cow, the giver should face east and the recipient north.
5. In Aagneya Puranam - One should face east while giving Kanya in danam. The vara should face west and look at the bride from foot to head in auspicious lagna.
6. Know that the contradiction in Smritis here refers to alternatives.
7. Vyasa - The giver of Kanyadanam should hold with his left hand the hand of the girl who is decorated with fine clothes and ornaments, pronounce his gotra together with the names of three ancestors starting from his great - grandfather and similarly the names of the ancestors of the bridegroom starting again from his great - grandfather and give the girl in danam. In Naandi sraadham and marriage, the order is from great - grandfather upto father; in other functions the order is from father to great - grandfather.
8. Daksha - Danam should be done pronouncing the gotra and names of ancestors starting from great - grandfather.
9. Jamadagni - Holding the girl with his left hand, starting from great - grandfather - - -
10. In Devi Puranam - Uttering the gotra first, followed by the names of great - grandfather, grandfather, father and girl and similarly the bridegroom’s gotra etc., one should do the danam. The bridegroom should stand and hold the sitting girl’s hand including her thumb and accept her by saying Rik mantras like ‘Grunhami’ etc.
11. In case the Agni is put out before commencing Aupasana, marriage should be done again.
12. In Sangraha in same way - In case the Agni is put out before commencing Aupasana, marriage should be done again. If Agni is put out after commencement of Aupasana, no need for marriage again. In case Agni is put out before Pravesa homa for Rigvedis, Aupasana for Yajurvedis and Lekhahoma for Samavedis, marriage should be done again.
13. Bodhayana - In case the Agni is put out before commencing Aupasana, marriage should be done again.
14. Bodhayana himself describes the procedure for fresh marriage - One should discard Ankuram, Pratisaram, Varanam, Pratigraham and Vastraachadanam.
15. Bodhayana on Agni being put out in case of Upanayanam, Marriage, Jatakarma and cremation - In case Agni is put out within four days in Marriage and Upanayanam, twelve days in Jatakarma and before Sanchayanam in cremation, one should sprinkle water with mantra ‘Apahataha’ and perform Sthandila samskara, establishing Agni, Paristaranam etc. and Prayaschitta homa and homa with mantras like ‘Ayascha’.
100. Time for Commencement of Aupasana
1. Aapasthambha on time for commencement of Aupasana - After Aagneya Sthalipakam, one should perform homa with his hand of rice or ‘yava’ (barley) in two Aahutis. Aupasana should be started in the night after completing Aagneya Sthalipakam, if 9 nazhigas (216 minutes) have not elapsed. Tatparyadarsanam states that Aupasana should be done the next day in the evening at the time of Agnihotra in case of lapse of 9 nazhigas.
2. In Smritiratnam - Considering three parts in a night, Sthalipakam and Aupasana homa may be performed in the first part; in the second part, only Sthalipakam may be done and not Nityahoma; in the third part, neither Sthalipakam nor Nityahoma.
3. Vyasa - In case of marriage in the night, Aupasana should be done then and there. In case time has been crossed in the night, Aupasana should be commenced the next day in the evening. Homa time in the morning is till end of Sangava and in the evening till 9 nazhigas after sunset.
101. Commencement of Sthalipakam
1. Aapasthambha - The bridegroom and the bride, after Aagneya Sthalipakam, should fast on Parva days (Amavasya and Pournami) and perform Sthalipakam the next day without Rishabhadakshina. Some say ‘Purnapatram is dakshina’.
2. This means that after Aagneya Sthalipakam, if Parva comes before Sesha homa, Sthalipakam should be performed. Elders also say - “During marriage if Parva comes befoe Sesha homa Sthalipakam should be performed as per procedure. If Amavasya or Pournami, Sthalipakam should be done.”
3. Here the statement that it can be done in Amavasya also refers to the following Pournami having dosha like moudhyam. Gautama on this - “Commencement of Pakayagna and Anvarambhanam should be done first in Purnima, not in Amavasya. If the following Purnima has dosha like moudhya, then what to do? Then, in Amavasya itself, one should perform the yaga for Purnima as well as Amavasya. Postponing to another occasion will result in sin for the performer. It will spoil lifespan, wealth and fame. Hence postponement should not be done.”
4. As the time for Purnima is upto Amavasya, one should perform Purnima Sthalipakam on days like Panchami prior to Amavasya and also Amavasya Sthalipakam in due time. This means that one should not perform both Sthalipakams on Prathama day.
5. There are sayings - “If moudhyam, Adhikamasam and eclipses of Sun or moon occur, Anvarambham should be done in the next Parva”; “If Aashadha month, Adhikamasa, Sankramnm or Eclipse occurs, Anvarambham (commencement) should be done in the next Parva”. These mean that Anvarambham should be done only in the next Parva, as Smriti texts say that there is dosha in beginning when there is moudhyam etc. e.g., Vriddha says that if Purnima next to Aadhanam occus in Malamasa (same as Adhikamasa), Anvarambham should not be done.
6. In Smrityarthasaram - Even in Vasanta ritu, if Malamasa etc. occur, karma should not be commenced; nor should Sthalipakam be commenced. “The first Ishti should not be performed if Eclipse or Adhikamasa occurs during the first Parva; same with moudhyam of Guru and Sukra. Sthalipakam after marriage should be performed in Uttarayanam. If performed in the four Pitrumasas, he will be destroyed. Commencement of Ishtis on Darsa (Amavasya) and Pournami and of Agnihitram, Pratishtha etc. should not be done in Malamasa. If started in good time, there is no bar for third Ishti etc. Aupasanagni, where homam is done without Sthalipakam in three ritus or three months, becomes Loukikaagni.” This applies to one who has gone far from his place, as Smriti says ‘Knowers of Veda say that Aupasanagini, where homam is done without Sthalipakam even after one ritu, becomes Loukikaagni.’
102. Adhivedanam (Marrying an additional Wife)
1. Manu - One can discard a wife, who drinks liquor, is of bad conduct, is not favourable to her husband, suffers from sinful disease, who tortures or always spends too much and he can marry again. One can discard a wife, who is barren since maturity, in 8th year; who delivers dead children, in 10th year; who bears only female children, in 11th year and he can remarry. If the wife speaks hateful words, she can be discarded instantly and the husband can remarry; but if she has a son, this should not be done. If the wife is of good conduct and is favourable in attitude, but happens to suffer from prolonged illness, she can be discarded with her permission; she should not be dishonoured. If the first wife leaves the home owing to anger at remarriage, she should be forced to stay at home or sent to her father’s home.
2. Yagnavalkya - One can discard a wife, who drinks liquor, is afflicted with prolonged illness, is of bad conduct, is barren, is used to losing money, speaks hateful words, delivers only female children or hates her husband and he can remarry. The first wife should be looked after; if not, much sin will accrue. Where the couple are harmonious, the three Purusharthas - Dharma, Artha and Kama grow. One, who discards a wife, who is obedient, is quick in action, has delivered a courageous son and speaks kind words and remarries, should give away one - third of his wealth to her. If he has no wealth, he should at least provide for her basic needs of food, clothing etc.
3. In Parasara Madhaviyam - One can discard a wife, who poses obstacles to dharma, is vampish, is given to too much of anger or talks unkind words and can remarry for protecting dharma.
4. Daksha - The first wife is called ‘Dharmapatni’; the second is only for pleasure. With her, only carnal pleasure can be enjoyed, not the strength of dharma. Only if the first wife is free from fault, she will be called ‘Dharmapatni’. It is not improper to discard a wife who has faults and to remarry.
5. In Smritiratnam - One who wishes to remarry for carnal pleasure should please the first wife with wealth before remarrying.
6. Bodhayana - One can discard a wife who is barren in 10th year, who bears only female children in 12th year, who delivers dead children in 15th year and one who speaks unkind words instantly. He can then remarry.
7. Aapasthambha - One should not remarry when his wife has faith in dharma and has children. If one of these two is absent, he can remarry; before Aadhanam. As there is bar on remarriage when wife is present, it means that after her death, whether before or after Aadhanam, one can remarry for dharma even if he already has a son.
8. Saatatapa - One can discard a wife, who drinks liquor, is afflicted with prolonged illness, is given to cheating, is barren, bears only female children, speaks hateful words, is used to losing money, or hates her husband and he can remarry.
9. In another Smriti - If one is to discard a wife who has illness, bears only female children, is barren, is mad, is post - menopause, but is free from fault, remarriage in such a case can be for pleasure, not for dharma.
10. Garga - Grihastha should have only one wife. He can marry another wife for pleasure only. He should not marry a girl for a third time, but can marry for a fourth time.
Arka (Sun - plant) Marriage:
11. Garga - One who marries a third wife out of delusion or ignorance, will lose wealth, foodgrains and lifespan. Even if he has long life, he will suffer from illness. For marrying a fourth wife, one should marry Arka plant. He should go out of the village in east or north direction to a place where Arka plant is available. After performing auspicious acts as proper and cleaning the earth, he should marry the Arka plant with proper clothing, Pratisaram (Rakska cord around wrist) etc. After performing Vivaha homam as per his Veda sakha, he should dedicate the Agni to himself and observe brahmacharya for three days. After observing brahmacharya at least for one day, he can marry the fourth wife without doubt.
12. Second, fourth marriages should be done if there is no progeny or wife is dead, as it is clear from many Sruti texts that one can take many wives for dharma and for progeny.
Time for Second etc. marriages:
13. Gargya - Marrying a different wife is auspicious in odd years; if in even years the husband will face destruction.
14. Vasishtha - One who has lost his wife can marry in the same year. He can do so even in the next Ayanam. Muni Sounaka says that he can marry in odd or even month.